On Just Getting By

When life gets tough, when great disappointments endure or perhaps failed relationships get rocky, we may come to a place where dismay is so great that we are inclined to do just enough to get by. Anything more seems too much trouble. There is a wonderful, eye-twinkling Yiddish word that comes to mind when I think about this place…the word is schlepp. Even the sound of it makes you want to smile, maybe even snicker a little. There is, of course the infinitive form of the verb, to schlepp. Then there is the active form of the verb, schlepping, often accompanied by an adverb, the word, along, so one does not simply schlepp , one is schlepping or schlepps along, all of which wraps up the whole idea of telling a good story, but not doing a whole lot.

Are we not stealing from ourselves......

Silliness aside, there is a serious element to just “getting by.” If we persist in getting by long enough, there can be a certain amount of theft taking place, maybe not so much involving other people, but actual theft from ourselves. Are we not stealing from ourselves when we do not make the effort to do a thing well, to the best of our abilities? Do we not see time dribbling by when we make minimal effort, almost using our energies by default? No care, no concern, no investment of ourselves?

Life can become more of a sigh....

Things, situations and circumstances die from just “getting by.” They die from lack…lack of love, lack of interest, lack of commitment, lack of genuine engagement. Life can become more of a sigh than anything else, and there is sadness in this. Not only are we not spending our capital wisely, we are wasting a lot of love and concern that could be coming our way.

Is this as good as it gets?


Maybe we could think seriously about the question: Is this as good as it gets? It never is, but there needs to be a place in us that sees...

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On Knowing Love is the Answer

As 2015 moves along, I do believe a new awareness is spreading into peoples’ minds. We have been experiencing the miseries of Ebola and the murderousness of ISIL, along with the usual run of disasters and upsets, but something new and lustrous is gathering space in the corners of our minds, something that is telling us that love really is the answer…not just kissy-face, smash-mouth love, but love that works, love that cares, love that sees the “other,” and love that recognizes our same-nesses more than our differences. People who willingly work in Ebola-stricken parts of the world know this; people who use their search operational equipment to find bodies lost to airplane crashes know this. People who volunteer to help in special needs know this.

Wholesale love will  begin to bloom...

Actually everyone is waking up to the signs…in groups here, groups there all over the world, groups connecting on purpose to serve, to do good, to bring possibilities to others, where before there were none. I think one of Malcolm Gladwell’s “tipping points” is being reached, and wholesale love will begin to bloom throughout the land.

Moving in the same direction...

Its demonstration will be different for all. For some it will be the giving of substance; for others it will mean being in the trenches, and some will fill the consciousness with constant prayer. For all it will be the knowing in some way that love is the only way. Nothing else will do, and every heart will be moving in the same direction.

Cannot be a pipedream anymore...

This cannot be a pipedream anymore. We have become too efficient at knowing how to kill one another. Now we must become even more spiritually efficient in choosing to save lives. Some parts of corporate America know this. Is it not the mandate of the Gates Foundation that “every person deserves the chance to live a healthy, productive life?”

Now is the time; life needs our best; love is the answer.

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On Being a Believer

I am a believer. Always have been at some level, and I don’t know why. I know only that it probably is part of my spiritual DNA. It has nothing to do with religions, which, in my opinion, have coalesced over time around the lives of exceptional people into hardened systems which don’t take kindly to questioning. I do like organized, spiritual thinking, however, and so found a philosophy that helps me give rational form to my somewhat inchoate, mental ramblings. I am content with this. It lets me question to my heart’s content and still gives me a way to go when things get hairy as human beings seem to insist on killing each other over their “differences.”

Easy for some....

Being a believer has been easy for some. Philosophers like Kant and Descartes simply plopped a God into their contemplations to give them backing. Others, like Hegel with the World Historical Spirit, and Jaspers, with his Existenz, were a bit gauzier about it. Then, of course, there is science which often reasons away the need for belief because of its capacities to go to the limits of thought with the Big Bang.

Doubt and wonder simply show us we're alive...

Being a believer has not been easy for others. Some want to suspend reason altogether and go straight to a system they probably inherited. But reason cannot be set aside because it can get us to a part of where we want to go. I think there is nothing whatsoever the matter with questioning. It can unbind the ignorant and keep us from too much certainty about that which cannot be made certain. Doubt and wonder simply show us we’re alive and in the game. The question of being is an ocean in which we will always be swimming.

Close to answering some soul questions...

I think that no one can know for us what we can only know for ourselves…not the wayshowers who can only show ways. I also think that knowing, at least in the world of belief, is tenuous at best. We should not fear the sometimes wondering but move into it instead, for here is the aliveness of belief. As far as I am concerned we are not lost and never have been. In the dark at times, maybe, but evidences, like light, show up along the road. If we develop kindness, compassion, loving concern about others, perhaps we are getting closer to answering some soul questions.

But, then, this is part of my belief.

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On Worrying

I am a consummate worrier. It’s not that I have a pessimistic view of life or look for trouble. In fact, I have a deeply-held spiritual belief that life is basically good and that, as the philosopher Ernest Holmes said, the universe is for us. I just seem to be wired for worrying. Probably because I am something of a control freak, knowing there is always a possibility that things may not go as I would like…which they often don’t…and this is worrisome.

Is his trust level higher?...

My husband, on the other hand, does not worry about much of anything. His quip to me is “Why should I be concerned? You worry enough for the two of us!” He’s infuriating…and he’s right. Is his trust level higher than mine? Have his life experiences given him a stronger hold on his own wellbeing? Perhaps. Maybe his having survived being an active pilot for the RAF during WWII has given him an outlook I cannot have. Whatever it is, it’s a blessing.

We keep trying...

But then, maybe there are at least a few gifts at hand for the worrier. I think that worrying keeps us present to what’s at hand. Annoyingly so. And it also suggests a level of caring about outcomes. Worriers want everyone and everything to be ok at all times. Impossible, but we keep trying.

Short circuit the ramp-up....

While worriers may not achieve permanent, laid-back coolness, we can be smarter about de-tensioning ourselves so we can short circuit the ramp-up of full-on worry before it takes hold. We can recognize the signs of mild freaking out that can sometimes accompany worry and remind ourselves of who we are and where we are. We can haul in perspective again and certainly practice more trust. Our worlds can be a little gentler, and perhaps we can bring together our abilities to both care and be at peace as well.

It’s certainly worth the effort.

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